Saturday, November 29, 2014

Sometimes you need to remind yourself why

I rolled out of bed this morning after another night of drinking with friends and some late night pizza.  I walked slowly to the mirror and carefully glanced up.

My heart felt heavy.

I wished I were smaller. 

I could be smaller.  I know how to do it. 

But as I stared into the mirror I hushed my inner critic and asked myself "why?" Why should I try to look any different?

Do I have some extra meat on my thighs?  Yes.

Do I have a curve to my belly?  Yes.

Am I healthy? Yes

Am I happy? More than ever.

Am I surrounded by people who love me? Yes.

So why?  Why do I need to change my shape?

I don't.



  1. I also needed this today. Thank you, my dear!

  2. Lifting you up with agreement in your attitude towards this moment in your life! I've been there myself. And yes, it is worth it. The happiness is worth a bit of extra cushion on your body if it means you're stressing less and enjoying life more and more by the minute.

    1. Kaylin, thank you for the thoughtful comment. It means so much to me to have the support of others, because sometimes it feels like a lonely battle. Thanks again :)

  3. 10000% needed to see this today. Thanks love.

    1. Yeah, I was feeling anxious about my size all weekend, but it is hard to articulate those feelings in a way that doesn't seem whiny and superficial. I think the simplest way to remind myself that I need to shift my perspective is to ask myself "why" I want to be smaller. It helped :) Hope you had an amazing weekend, I definitely thought of you!

  4. I have been struggling hard with these very feelings recently and your post encouraged me beyond words. You know how painful these constant thoughts can be, and this helped bring me one step closer to being free of them. Thanks again for your openness and for sharing your journey in a way that helps so many!

    1. Yeah, these thoughts are really tough to kick. I feel like I am constantly questioning myself, and I am in this raw state of vulnerability. Without rules and control over my body I struggle to accept myself and my natural shape. I know we will get there - one day at a time. Thanks for your support and I know you can overcome this!